It's true. This is how I work. Criticism does nothing but fill me with an insatiable desire to prove you wrong. So, no. I don't get mad, I get productive. That is, when the criticism regarding me or my actions is not true. If it's true and I know it, I pout like a little baby. Ask my parents... they're experts on the latter.
I write this next part realizing full well that it may seem entirely self-involved and ridiculous. But please rest assured that I don't mean it that way. Have you ever had a bunch of people (bunch, read more than one) telling you that you're practically on the verge of something really big? But the whole time you're thinking, really? I don't see it, guys. That's where I am. Do I feel like I'm on the verge? The verge of a nervous breakdown maybe... I would never consider that I had a problem with self-confidence growing up. It's being an adult that's done me in. I know for a fact that I was much more sure of myself back when I was a teen - opposite of how things usually are, so I'm told. Now it would appear that my lack of confidence is creating some problems in my life. And when I say confidence, I'm not necessarily referring to feeling good about myself or personality. It's more of a lack of confidence that always keeps you second-guessing yourself, your thoughts, actions, etc., which obviously can create some problems. I tend now to over-think things a lot, which just leads to more stress in the end. When faced with a self issue, I do always want to turn inside and do a little searching. Is it really true? If so, where does it stem from? What happened in my life to make me do this or think this? I just don't know.
Let me go think about this some more...
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