Thin Crust

I hate when I arrive at a point in my life when I feel like I'm disappointing people left and right. Usually, that means that I've stretched myself too thin. And because I was given my mother's desire to be everything to everyone at all times, that's easy to do. I need to learn that it's okay to say no sometimes. Why, oh why do I feel like if I say no, I'm doing something wrong? I fully understand that it's more wrong to say yes if you can't follow through than to say no and be done with it if you really can't do it. But it's so much harder than that for me. It's something to work on for sure.

On another exciting note, we have a rather large catering gig next week quite unexpectedly and we've been asked to teach a pasta making class at a local specialty food supply shop in April! Very exciting stuff. This is what we want to do. It's stressful now because we do the stuff we love on the side (squeezing it into our schedule where and when we can). But one day maybe we will be able to do only this - making awesome food for people to enjoy. Here's hoping!

Can I say something about facebook? I love it just as much as the next person, surf it daily, stalk (strictly in the harmless sense), whatever. But there are some facebook behaviors that I just find terrifically annoying.

1. I understand that you have the right to talk to whomever you choose on facebook and that you can show the world your relationship status, but do we all need to be a part of the lovey-dovey wall posts?  Also, wouldn't you prefer to say those things in person, directly to that person? An I love you here or there is great, fine even. But I don't know. That's still something I prefer to say to my husband face to face.

2. Photo tagging is a great feature on facebook. You can find all sorts of pictures of yourself or your friends that you never knew existed. It's pretty cool. However, I really don't understand friends that not only post gratuitous pictures of themselves ALL  the time, but tag themselves in them and write captions like: Not the best pic of me! Well, then don't post it! And you know you're just asking for validation, waiting for someone to say: No!  You look great! PS - this does not apply to pictures of you that other people post and tag - just to be clear!

3. Dear friends, I love you and know a lot of you do this, but your posts that are formatted like this really drive me nuts. I would appreciate it if you would stop - immediately. Kthnxbye! OR Love, Me

4. Statuses that are strictly and always a play-by-play of your day or a constant strand of complaints or whinings are not appreciated. Every once in a while is okay, absolutely. I do it too, but not all the time! You're bringing me down, man!

Whew! I feel better! Just something I've been needing to get off my chest! Thanks for indulging me.

Totally unrelated, but I am currently watching Grey's Anatomy and the cast members are singing. They are actors and actresses, not singers. ABC, BAD IDEA! Don't do it again. It's just weird. I like your shows, but this is wrong. They can't even really sing and I can't believe they agreed to this. Sorry guys, you tried and it's not good.

Finito!!!

I don't know about you, but I'm ready for some real spring weather. None of this teaser crap where it's stunningly gorgeous for a couple of days and now it's gray and rainy for a week. Boo!

Well, get excited because I can feel a revival coming. A revival of my desire to cook. Not tonight of course, I've popped a frozen pizza in the oven, but soon. I got a taste of it again when cooking for awesome friends last weekend. It is a bit of a cycle though. I come home tired and the last thing I want to do is cook, but when I do cook, it really relaxes me and relieves some stress. I'll have to remember that and work through the fatigue and the desire to be lazy, and force myself to cook. I know it will do me good! And, don't worry, I will be sure to share my endeavors, either here or on The Saucy Italian.

Speaking of food, in celebration of meeting our big deadline (a day ahead of time, ahem) our wonderful project manager wanted to treat us to lunch. So, we went to the bitching burger joint across the parking lot that I've written about before. Before we went, we noticed there were some fire trucks outside, but by the time we were headed over, they were gone. After we had been seated, been given our drinks and had our orders taken, the fire trucks came back. We noticed it was a little smokey, but no one was panicked, even the firefighters casually strolled in. But then they kept walking around, and came back in with more equipment, then carried a ladder into the kitchen. So, they evacuated the restaurant and, after a few minutes of waiting around, announced that they would not be able to open back up for lunch and gave us a voucher for a FREE hamburger! Score! Needless to say, I will be returning tomorrow to cash in on that. Also our boss is treating us there for a little celebration party tomorrow afternoon, so the timing is perfect.

It's nice to get to the other side of a difficult struggle. There is such a sense of relief. I know we all felt like it was the last day of school before summer break today. We've met all of our deadlines before, but this one is different. We have half the staff and have had to deal with countless cleanups of other's mistakes and messes. Yes, I can safely say that (no matter what anyone else says or thinks) this was an incredible accomplishment and I am happy to have had the learning experience with some of my best friends.

Leggings are not pants

Just in case any of you were wondering, leggings are not pants. Do I wear leggings? Yes, I do. Do I wear them with tunics or other dress-like shirts? Yes. But, no matter how you slice it, leggings are still not pants. Yes, they're cute, comfy and convenient, but they're made to be worn with other garments that cover your cheeks and (as was so delicately coined on a "Say Yes to the Dress" episode I watched this weekend) your butterfly. Some people seem to have failed to notice that these leggings are made of stretchy, thin cotton - hence the non-pantsness. This makes them comfortable and easy to wear, which is totally great! But, there is also quite the drawback to thin cotton. This:

This actress has just willingly showed off her rear in all its glory. Don't get me wrong, it's still much, much better than mine, but I'm sure she would never want her backside to be shown like this! I believe it's safe to say that if you can make out actual skin through the fabric of your "pants" that they're not really pants.

Another thing that really bothers me, not because it's happened that recently, but it's really an ongoing problem. Whenever anything of consequence happens in the area of the country where I live, the news channels seem incapable of finding anyone who is a) not a complete redneck, b) capable of formulating a coherent sentence or c) actually knows what's going on. If this were only on the local news, fine, so be it. We all know how we are, but it's when it's on the national news that it really gets me. I promise there are a whole bunch of people living in the Southeast of the United States of America that are eloquent and intelligent.

The movie Arthur comes out next week and I have to say, I am really excited about seeing it. It looks pretty hysterical and come on, who doesn't love Russell Brand?

I want to write because I do love writing my blog, but if you can't tell, my thoughts are random and scarcely pieced together at best. But, good news, tomorrow my big deadline will be met, a day ahead of schedule and I'm planning on some good times. I might actually pull out the video camera I bought more than a month ago. That's right, you might be in for the treat of an original Un-fabulous Life video this weekend. Get ready world.

Girls Gone Wild?

I have recently revamped my entire morning routine. It really happened by accident one day when I didn't hear my alarm (5:30-5:45ish and way too early) and woke up on my own closer to 7:00. I still had time to do all I wanted and made it to work on time. Plus, I woke up feeling completely refreshed. So, I'm just trying to go with it and it seems to be working pretty well! One of the best things about waking up then is that I don't miss Good Morning America, which I love. This past weekend I saw the most disturbing story about little girls' swimsuits. A major American clothing retailer is selling triangle bikini tops with padding - marketed (according to GMA) to as young as 8 year-olds. I could vomit. That is sexualization of baby children. That is disgusting.

Last week my husband and I were out to dinner and I couldn't help but watch these two young girls (probably ten) running around in their little girl clothes but with makeup on. And not play makeup, but eyeliner and eyeshadow makeup. It just screamed wrong and was really distracting, not to mention disturbing. When I was a little girl, this is how my friends and I played makeup (E.M.H., if you're reading, I'm sure you remember a certain eyeshadow all over the face incident!):

But these girls were into some serious heavy eyeliner. And where are the parents to say no?! You are too young. Apparently nowhere to be found. I played dress up as a child and experimented with makeup, but I never would have been allowed to wear a padded bikini swimsuit or go out in public with eyeliner on at age 8. That's taking things too far. And people come at this argument from two sides.

1. The parents should draw the line. If there weren't the request, there would be no production of such products. 

2. The manufacturers should never make the products in the first place.

I tend to agree a bit with both sides. While I think the manufacturers of these bathing suits should be ashamed of themselves, I also agree that the parents simply shouldn't allow their little girls to wear such adult clothing items. But the root of the problem is truly the fact that the manufacturers are essentially selling a body image to young girls that you are not good enough the way you are. This type of thought implanted in their minds and left to grow has dire consequences down the road. Poor self esteem pushes them to seek attention in all the most inappropriate ways - smoking, drinking, sex, drugs. The saddest thing about it all is that kids can't be kids anymore. There is no childhood - it's disappearing before our eyes. It makes me all the more grateful for the wonderful childhood I was afforded without so many pressures to grow up so quickly. 

Another side of the problem - oh wait! We have a pedophilia epidemic in our country! eSecurity Planet reports that over the past 5 years, the calls to them reporting child pornography have increased 300%. If that's not disturbing, I don't know what is. I can't go so far as to say that this is all directly related to the sales of some padded bathing suit tops for little girls, but there has to be a correlation somewhere. Retailers in America are so caught up in making more and more money that they have ceased to think about the wide scale social consequences to their actions. 

I could never claim to be the most responsible consumer, but stories like this really make me wake up and pay attention to where I'm spending my money. I for one, would rather spend my money supporting initiatives like this one.

The Patriot

I would consider myself to be a very patriotic person. I love America and yes, I take some offense when Americans take all the freedom we are afforded for granted and complain about wanting to move to a foreign country. If you want to go move to a foreign country, fine. But don't do it with the mindset that everything outside the U.S. is roses. We've got it pretty darn good and we don't even realize it most of the time. All that said, I have come to see this year (since it's the first that I've ever owed taxes instead of getting a nice refund) that even the strongest of patriots can be reduced to complaining and whining when it comes to tax time. I know that our tax money is needed to fund some really good programs for ourselves and for others. I know that taxes are a 'necessary evil'. But, I would rather still have my savings intact after filing taxes than completely cleaned out. Not having any savings makes me nervous.

Well, here we are. The last week of March, my big deadline for work is coming to an end. Thursday is D-Day. Granted, after Thursday I just have to start worrying about a whole new group of problems, but at least the looming deadline will no longer be hanging over my head. The stress has been a lot to deal with, but I am beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel and I'm hoping it looks like a really nice bonus and a raise. A girl can dream, right? I'll be sure to let you know if I'll actually feel any pressure off or if the new pressures will just take right over. I'm guessing the latter.

We we we so excited

I am certain that most of you have seen this, but in case you haven't, you ought to.

Cute girl, irritating voice (mostly due to auto tune), ridiculous video and lyrics, very nasty comments on YouTube. I first saw about this video on Good Morning America. It's pretty obviously a terrible song. The lyrics are what one might expect to come from an eight year old, but Ms. Black is thirteen. The bridge actually states as follows: Yesterday was Thursday/ Today it is Friday... Tomorrow is Saturday/ Then Sunday comes afterwards. Ouch. I mean, really? The whole story on GMA was really about all the mean comments people were posting about the video and Becky herself. And if you take the time to read some, they are pretty terrible. However, there are a couple of things to think about before you get all over the people making the comments.

1. Who put her up to this? Did someone along the way tell her she had an amazing talent along the way? We see this happen every year when they air the auditions for American Idol. Parents or friends misled (lied) and told their child or best friend that they had a good voice and sounded great. Therefore, they start thinking about all the singing competitions available to people now and decide to audition. They get put on national television not to applaud their great talent, but to string them up for a firing squad of criticism. Really uplifting stuff. I realize I'm not a parent, but I know from the experience of being someone's child that there comes a time where you have to steer your children in the direction of their natural talents. I did rec. league sports for years because all my close friends did. But, believe me when I say, I am not an athlete, unless you consider couch potatoing a sport. Which you wouldn't of course, because it's pathetically not. And I don't even remember this happening, but at some point in time my parents steered me in the direction of music and away from sports. It was subtly done with love. My parents wanted me to be successful and have self confidence.

2. If you're putting this crap on YouTube (public domain), you're asking for people to view and comment in one way or another. So, if you don't want your feelings hurt, don't ever put something on the internet. I write a blog. I realize that anyone at anytime could find what I have to say to be completely wrong, ridiculous or offensive and they have the right to comment as such. It may hurt my feelings, but it was ultimately my decision to put my thoughts out there for everyone to see. You make yourself vulnerable. And when you make yourself vulnerable, you always run the risk of getting shot down. That is what is currently happening. But, mark my words. Someone at some record company will feel sorry for her and see an opportunity to cash in on the negative attention given to her song and her video and she'll wind up with a record deal. Or we'll see her in another sequel of High School Musical or on an episode of Glee sometime in the future.

If you hated the video, you'll love the sequel.

Shut the front door!!!

Do you ever find yourself having to deal with someone who just won't shut up?! That's my life five days a week (also, in case you're wondering, I'm not talking about any of my co-workers). This creates some problems really in several ways. First, I have to find a way to not have my mind wander too much just in case this person is saying something that involves some form of participation on my part. It's hard, really hard. I have sudden urges (when I'm consciously thinking about what he's saying) to scream "I have no idea what you're talking about, nor do I care!". But I can't do that because I'm a professional. Most of the time.

I'm also sick of all the gossip surrounding our department and line of work. Besides my office friends, we contract with a bunch of men, although they're more like women than you'd think. I swear they must just sit around and chit-chat all the time, giving each other manicures and brushing each other's hair. Just when the air from one rumor begins to clear, another one sweeps right in. Unbelievable. I thought that men were all about facing problems head on. If you've got something to say about me then say it to my face! But apparently, that's not the case. Well, you know what I say? Grow a couple.

Trump Train

So, I know I've stated pretty clearly in other posts that I'm not much for politics. That definitely still stands. However, it has just recently occurred to me that next year is 2012, a Presidential election year. The last election was the first one I was able to vote in and I had to vote from Italy. It was actually kind of nice to be so disconnected from it. Yes, it was still all over the news, but I didn't have to deal with any passionate debates and crazy slandering commercials. That is the thing I hate most about elections - the mudslinging. I don't care about you discrediting the other guy, I want to know where you stand on the issues. If we ever get a candidate who only defends himself against rival campaigns and doesn't himself participate in the mudslinging, I would totally vote for him or her, party aside. That in and of itself would be enough for me. But alas, I don't see that happening anytime soon.

What I am about to lay out to you, if I had heard it coming from someone else before I was better informed, I would have said you're crazy. Well, here I am. And here it is. Donald Trump. I really think he's on to something. I've never been a huge fan, but never really been against him either. But now after I've seen interviews and heard his point of view, I'm cautiously on board. Cautiously because I'm always hesitant to be gung-ho for any political candidate. There's too much risk of looking like a complete and total fool if things don't work out. So, on the record, I'm cautiously somewhat behind Donald Trump. Ambiguous enough? I think so.

But a lot of things he said really made sense to me. He's independently wealthy, has stated he would not take a salary (pocket change for him, anyway) and stated that if something arises that needs, say, $600 million to get running, he'll put it up - because, oh wait, HE CAN!!! I also like his take on getting back to infrastructure in America. We need to be concentrating on the basics that other countries all around the world are focusing on using our money. Ouch. So true. Plus, look at the empire he has built. Think of the countless number of jobs he has created. I know a lot of people who wouldn't mind seeing someone be able to do that for America.

I don't know about you, but I think that looks like a man who can get things done. Ferocious. Even, tiger blood?

Outdoor Fun

This weekend the hubs and I were quite productive in the yard. We cut down bushes (more like trees at this point), weeded, disassembled our pitiful split rail fence that fell in the tornado, and tackled some of the leaf situation that we neglected in the fall - big mistake, apparently it kills your grass... oops! I think we did leaves once and some of the residual ones had been compacted, keeping our grass covered, but I know it will come back. I know it's too early to plant, I would be devastated if the temperature goes back down and a frost kills my newly-planted babies, but at least we were able to plan some this weekend. This area

is where we will be planting our garden. Needs some work, doesn't it? We've got big plans - tiers, fruit, veggies. It will be beautiful. We've even bought our seeds already - cherry tomatoes, spinach, bell peppers, okra, squash, zucchini, hot peppers and basil. We're also going to buy raspberry and blueberry plants and a sweet plum tree. They're not only beautiful but produce some yummy fruit.

Aside from the garden, when I came back from Nashville on Friday, I came back to the most beautiful flowering tree in our back yard. I didn't even know we had it!

I spent most of my Saturday afternoon sitting by the kitchen window with it open, looking at the tree and breathing the fresh air. I know, disgustingly perfect, but it really was. Another perfect thing?

Yep, that's my baby. Isn't she precious? I think she's the most beautiful girl in the world - because she is. 

It's exciting and exhausting simultaneously to realize that we've pretty much completed everything inside the house and can now move outdoors. But, I think it'll be pretty great. I'm just happy that the weather has changed. It couldn't be more perfect right now. Let's hope it stays this way...

S.A.D.

I know that seasonal affective disorder is very real for some people, but really, deep down inside I have always thought it was a little bogus. However, after my outdoor sun exposure over the past weekend, I'm reconsidering my position on the matter. It has done wonders for my mood this week so far. It's amazing what so little can do to affect how you feel. All this to say, I can't wait for full-fledged spring to be here.

And speaking of spring, I'm beginning to plan my spring planting. I want to deck out my yard - front and back - in beautiful color. I've got my little paper lanterns and twinkle lights up on the back deck and I've torn up and tossed all the dead flowers from last season. I think the most exciting thing is that my mums actually came back from the fall! I didn't even take that good care of them! I'm definitely not complaining though. The best thing for me to do will be to plant flowers that don't involve much upkeep. I had some really good experience with vinca.

And they're pretty!

I was pretty successful last summer and it was freaking hot! I managed to not kill any of my plants. All this coming from the girl who once not only killed a basil plant in a week, but also managed to have it grow fuzz. It was pathetic.

Tomorrow I leave for Nashville for work. I'll be back on Friday night, so I'm there for two nights. I'm thinking karaoke or something might be in order. It's always a lot of fun when you know that you can act the fool and nobody there knows you. It might really help to free me of any inhibitions. Not that I usually have trouble with that - especially when I've had a couple of cocktails.

I've really been thinking (as I'm sure we all have been) about Japan over the past couple of days. At this point it's really just adding insult to injury. Massive earthquake, tsunami, possible/actual nuclear meltdown. Can we even begin to imagine what they are experiencing? We all need to pray for a miracle for them. That is all we can do. They need a miracle in a very big way.

Hilarity

So, I was reminded today of somethings that I find extremely funny. For this I thank you - you know who you are. My day was much less stressful than I was anticipating because we just kept laughing. My lunch break today involved some chamomile tea while watching an episode of Modern Family. Relaxation and stress relief (laughter). Yes, I'm a little late, but that show is hysterical. It's one of the few where I'll catch myself laughing out loud even when no one else is around. An absolute stroke of genius.

Speaking of genius...

If only we could all return to the days when Mad TV and SNL were funny. I've always been more partial to SNL myself. Mad TV was funny, but it was definitely the more crude, inappropriate stepchild of SNL. I adore the original cast of SNL with Gilda, Laraine, Chevy, Dan... Oh, those were the days of true hilarity. While the classics are my favorite, I also really loved the time of Adam Sandler and Chris Farley. But my favorite time span is this:

Those names evoke images of some of the funniest skits known to man. Celebrity Jeopardy, the cheerleaders, the lovers, Marty Culp and Bobbi Moughan-Culp - the list could go on and on. So many good memories, so many funny people. 


Sometimes (I've learned) things get to a point where all you can do is just sit back and laugh. There's no sense in killing yourself with tension and stress. And yes, this is a complete self pep-talk. Today it all worked out for me. We'll see how it goes tomorrow and beyond. For now, I'll take comfort in the fact that this will always make me laugh.

A classic, no doubt. I also wanted to put the video with Will Ferrell and his patriotic speedo and the Celebrity Jeopardy with Burt Reynolds as Turd Ferguson, but alas... YouTube has them not.

Chill!!!

I am in overload. And I probably will be until the end of this month. I know that's a relatively short period of time, but it is starting to get to me. I'm feeling the pressure - it's on. At this point of things, I do have a tendency to want to shut down. It's my defense mechanism. This time, I don't have that as a possibility. I just can't. So, is my office beginning to resemble a spa more than a workplace? Yes. Am I going to start drinking down chamomile tea like it's nobody's business? Yes. But I figure, whatever works...

In talking things out to my husband yesterday, I did finally get to the root of what is really bothering me. I do not want to disappoint anybody and I know that's not really an option over the next few weeks. I will (and probably already have) disappoint someone to whom I've made a commitment. I hate it. But I'm also learning that sometimes it's just a part of life. You get spread too thin and you can't be everything to everybody and sometimes the right option is to choose to get some more rest or do something relaxing for yourself. You will end up probably disappointing everybody if you're too tired and run down to be productive (and nice).

credit

On a different and exciting note: The decision has finally been made. A business will be opened and the world will be able to taste the culinary stylings of my extremely talented husband. We're picturing an Italian dinner home delivery service. An authentic, delicious, homemade Italian meal (complete with a beautiful veggie salad and fresh homemade bread) brought straight to your door 5 (or 6) days a week. We're finally on the same page and think this is the best route for us to take. I'm excited!

PS - I think he should deliver on something like this!!!

Let me know what you think about the idea...

Fancy Burgers

My two beloved colleagues and I went out to lunch today at a new place that just opened, conveniently located directly across from our office. It just so happens to specialize in two of my biggest weaknesses - burgers and fries. I did spend some time this week fasting in preparation for Ash Wednesday, to take my focus off of frivolous things (namely, food) and back to where it needs to be - on God. I'm giving up/taking on a lot of things for Lent this year because I know that I am called to be more disciplined and take better care of myself than I currently am. So, today instead of eating everything that was put in front of me today, I took the other half of my gourmet burger home to share with my husband (wasn't that nice of me?! Believe me it was if you knew how much I love burgers and fries).  Now, this place has been open for several weeks and the only thing that has kept us from eating there so far is that the place is always packed out. We've only got an hour for lunch and a 20 minute wait is a little more than we can do. But today it finally worked out. I've had the menu for over a month and I periodically look it over. Quite frankly, the combinations seem a little intimidating. There's not a single 'normal' burger on there. I had a spiced turkey burger with a tomato pepper compote, lettuce, tomato, smoked gouda and a black-raspberry mayo.

It was awesome.

Believe me when I say that this is not a plug and surely they won't mind me doing this, but check out this menu. I typically like my food pretty simple. Many people would disagree. I'm most certainly not a picky eater. I consider myself to be pretty adventurous. But let's be real. A hamburger's a hamburger. I really didn't know if I would enjoy one of their combinations and considered asking for my own, but I'm so glad I didn't. The burger was fantastic! Their onion rings and fries delicious. I highly recommend it.

I would definitely have to say I was a skeptic. And here's why. Generally speaking, holes in the wall serve better food than the 'gourmet' or fancy places. Mexican places being the prime examples of this. I love the fact that I can frequent my local Mexican place with my husband, share an entree that has more than enough food for us both, get a pair of margaritas a piece during happy hour and only pay $25. It makes me happy. I've been to a couple fancy Mexican places and really just ended up being disappointed. Most of the stuff is just as good if not better at my h.i.w. and it costs a lot less.

My point being, the hamburger joint near work has rocked my world. Maybe I've just been right all along. Maybe fancy is better...

The Nest of English Comfort

My husband is currently faced with researching some things for a future business we plan to open. He is Italian and while he may not be fluent in English, he is certainly doing a wonderful job picking up on nuances and vocabularu in the English language. Unfortunately, because of how my job is right now, I will have zero time to make calls or research things, especially since most of this information is easily accessible during business hours (when I'm already working. I'll get back to that later.). So, I had to gently push him out of the nest of English comfort. That being, when your closest personal link in the foreign language that you have taken on nudges you towards the direction of independence. Honestly, I have to admit that my husband has been much better about this than I was. For as fearless as I seem (or at least how I seem or would like to think of myself), I turned into quite the chicken sometimes when we were in Italy and I was faced with doing something where conversing with a stranger in Italian would be necessary. Most of my fears have subsided, but there is a definite period of panic when learning a foreign language. I am mostly considered 100% fluent in Italian. I shouldn't have any problems with trying to ask for assistance in a store or make a telephone call, but I still carry a certain level of nervousness that for whatever reason I won't understand. Take Italy. You have 20 different regions, 190 different provinces and a nearly infinite number of 'fractions' inside those. Each of these groups has their own dialect. Yes, practically a whole different language associated with the geographical area. Then you have to deal with the accents, slang, the elderly who sometimes speak a whole language themselves. It's crazy. While my husband may have a more difficult language to deal with (difficult because none of us speak properly), he at least doesn't have to deal with a billion different dialects and accents. I know we may differ some across the United States in some specific terminology, but as a whole we primarily share the same vocabulary or at least know the proper terms for everything. I think he got the easier language to deal with.... just saying.

Business hours. You know where I stand on working Monday through Friday, 9 to 5. Business hours are just as ridiculous to me. You'd think that people like mechanics, doctors offices, etc. would have figured this out by now. If you made yourselves available after what people think of as traditional business hours, you'd make a killing. But, unfortunately these sectors can rest on the fact that when people need their services, they REALLY need their services and usually can't wait. Something has to give, though. I can't get everything done that I need to if the very services I need are only available when I have to be at work. But, alas. Such is life.

Same Difference

If there's anything that my adolescent - adult life has taught me, it's that despite how different we all may seem on the surface, we're really so much more alike than we realize. I've spent time overseas and met people from all over. Yes, we all have differences - culture, heritage, religion, sexual orientation, race. And there's no denying that as time goes on, most of these things are seeming to drive a wedge even further between a lot of us. There is so much misunderstanding, misconception and the like that we've all lost sight of how similar we are. It is hard to see past some of those differences, yes. But if we all want to get along, we have to. Deep down inside we all have a lot of the same fears, dreams, thoughts. What changes is how we react to those things and how we act on them. Same difference? Exactly.

The universe has a sick sense of humor. Just when you think things are turning the corner... BAM! Not. You spend your whole day in a good mood and then one little (or big, whatever the case may be) thing happens and all of that happy-go-luckiness is gone, totally pushed out of your mind as if it never existed. I find that that works much the same in my job as well. I unfortunately rarely can remember the name of a client who was sweet, patient, kind, but I can name every single one of the clients who has raised hell, yelled and cussed at me and threatened my job. This, too, I find to be unfair (Have you noticed I'm finding a lot of things to be unfair lately? Yes, it's hit me finally. Life just isn't fair. And you get to be around to hear me tell about it). For once, just once in my life I'd like to be able to take one step forward without having to take two steps back.

The saddest realization of my day is this. How is it that I know more about what's going on with Charlie Sheen than what's happening in Libya? How did the media's prioritization of news get so skewed? Oh, wait. It's us. Apparently all we care about is watching people we have put up on a pedestal fall. That's pretty sick. But also true. I know all about the 'tiger blood' and his own little webcast he's started to rant and rave about... Oh, right. NOBODY  KNOWS! Not only is he an addict to just about everything, but now he's apparently certifiably crazy. Yet, I can't even begin to tell you why the situation in Libya is taking place nor how the situation in Egypt concluded. The saddest thing is that I don't even watch the news hardly. All of this is just what I've picked up in passing. And it's all about Charlie. Yes, the universe has a sick sense of humor.

Bir-duh!!!

Has anyone been watching those commercials for the re-release of Bambi on Blu-ray? Well, they seem to be all over the channels I watch and I revert to a 5 year-old every time. So, I finally broke down tonight, bought the DVD and watched it. That movie is beautiful and hilarious. Some of the random, obscure things I remember astound me. Like in the beginning when the little mouse comes out of his little nest and sees a drop of dew on a tall blade of grass and picks it to wash his face with. Precious! Then you have Thumper, Flower and the whole gang. How could you not love them? But my favorite scene? This one right here...

I think this beyond enjoyable experience has inspired me to borrow the entire Disney VHS collection (at least the movies from my childhood) from my parents and watch them all. I love them all. The only problem is we don't have a VCR. Oh, well. I'll make it work. Bambi and the gang are totally worth it.

So, my stress and anxiety is getting to me so bad during the day that I'm going to try some pretty basic, but silly techniques. I have purchased a little relaxation fountain and a new reed diffuser. We'll see how it goes. I know a couple of girls who I'm sure will be grateful if it works!

Habits

Congratulations to Disney on Wheels - winner of my giveaway sponsored by CSN stores!

Why is it that bad habits are so hard to break and good habits are so hard to have stick? I find this to be completely unfair. Like my habit of coming home and collapsing on the couch. That sticks like no other. But finding time to work out? As long as I have been alive, I make it work for a few weeks, months at most and then I stop. And there's always something that happens that gets me off track and I just never get back on. I'm not really good at keeping my good habits when things might get a little hard or my schedule may get a little tricky. Well, I'm tired of it. I no longer want to be a failure at my life! (PS - I say that laughing. Written communication lends itself to misunderstanding so easily.)

So, I went to Memphis this past week for work, which is why I wasn't able to write much. I went for a day which made for a couple of long days of driving. Lucky for me, I was given a new Hyundai Sonata to drive. And I'm in love. Really, I'm in love with most new cars. They're just so pretty and fancy. And I'm always looking for some more fancy in my life. Like the new throw pillows I got for our living room sofa today. Perfect, no?

And I have a lot of fancy plans for our yard once the weather clears up. See? I've jinxed myself now. All my good intentions while the weather was actually super nice are now no longer since it's cold again and rainy like crazy. You know, this really comes back to my first point of habits. My strongest habit is quite possibly that of procrastination. It's awesome. I actually wrote this blog post a couple of days, I just now got around to posting it...

Backstreet's Back

I now work with only two other girls who are approximately my age. We're in an office all by ourselves and well, things can get girly sometimes. Like today when one of them put on the Backstreet Boys Pandora channel (You know who you are! And I thank you too that I can extract material like this from work to write in my blog instead of all the other drama we had to go through!). It's funny how tied the memory is to music. I know that people say that the olfactory sense is most tied to memory and I do find that to be true, but because I grew up with music and have always been what I consider a 'musical' person, I find that audition is just as strongly linked to memory. For example, when I hear Christina Aguillera's "Genie in a Bottle" I am instantly taken back to the 7th grade. I was on a school bus with my entire class and we were on our way up the mountain going back to school after a field trip. And yes, we were all singing, and yes, I can see how 7th graders singing those suggestive lyrics is really not only laughable but horrifying. "I'm a genie in a bottle baby, gotta rub me the right way honey"? Yikes. The start of dirty lyrics? No. And I can remember so much worse that I know I learned before I had any clue what they meant, but I knew those words. I surely sang them out loud and it was probably a source of embarrassment for whoever was around me if they understood what I was singing. 

Take the Boyz II Men classic "Make Love to You". I love me some Boyz II Men. But I also find it to be somewhat disturbing that I know most all of the lyrics and that song came out in 1995. I was 8 years old. 

"Throw your clothes on the floor
I'm gonna take my clothes off too
I made plans to be with you
Girl whatever you ask me you know I'll do"

Yowza.

Reliving all these songs also made me realize how pathetic most of the lyrics are. The Backstreet Boys' "As Long As You Love Me" is a prime example. The lyrics actually say, "I don't care who you are, where you're from, what you did, as long as you love me". Apparently for the Boys, that's all it takes. As long as you love me, I'm good and the rest of the stuff doesn't really matter. Wow. It's pretty sad when you think about it.

And then, of course, there was Celine. It's funny when you think about it. Her music really doesn't match any qualities of the Backstreet Boys, but oddly, none of us questioned her being present on that Pandora station. It just made sense. And the song that came on just happened to be "My Heart Will Go On" (thanks L.S. for reminding me what the song is actually called. I probably would've ended up calling it "Near, Far"). Which brings me to this: 

I know it's a little long, but stick with it. It's worth it. You gotta love Ana Gasteyer. 

You guys want some cookies?

So my husband, being from Italy, has never before partaken in the glorious taste triumph that is Girl Scout cookies. I know, I know - inconceivable. We pull up to our local Hobby Lobby on Saturday and low and behold out front are some adorable little Girl Scouts with their cases of cookies in tow. Naturally, I had to partake. I got a box of Samoas, Tagalongs, Do-si-dos and Thin Mints. And yes, they are all gone (PS - it's Tuesday). While buying them hubs asked if they were made locally or were homemade or something that would warrant such fanfare. I told him that no, they are in fact mass-produced all over the United States and that they are just exceptionally delicious and special because you can't find them in the store or get them year-round. I must say he fully agrees.

On another note... Storms ripped through my area of the country yesterday. I am not one who is frightened of storms, not even when I was little, they're actually one of my most favorite things in life. But in my office (street level with lots of windows) as the storm rolled in, there was a moment when I thought we were going to have to move to the inside hallway. The wind and rain came through so fast and furious, it was unlike anything I have ever seen. On my way home on the interstate, some of the exit signs were wrapped around trees and one of the light poles had fallen completely over. Arriving in my neighborhood there were huge trees down everywhere. Just the sight of some of them terrified me. Giant weeping willows, huge pine trees - it was unbelievable. Thank God that our house was practically untouched but unfortunately for our neighbors that was not the case. They have a large tree fallen over their living room and several enormous trees down in the back yard. The neighbor on the other side of us has uprooted trees in their back yard as well. The next door neighbor's insurance agent even said that we were lucky. Apparently the two trees in our front yard are usually the first to go in storms like we saw yesterday. All in all, it was an absolutely crazy day and I'm glad that everyone seems to have gotten out safely. I just hope that all those with damaged or destroyed houses have homeowners insurance. Yesterday sure made me grateful that I've got it.